Don’t Put the Kids in the Middle with Maud Purcell

It’s so tempting to bash your ex, especially if you’re hurting. But it will backfire. This is not about getting back at each other; it’s about keeping your kids intact.


Is it OK to throw in little zingers about the other parent? You may have gotten away with that when you were married, but it takes on a whole new meaning when you’re divorced. When one parent is on a campaign to destroy the other parent, it creates untold damage to the kids. Think about it: they are a creation of both of you and they want to believe that they have two wonderful parents despite the divorce.


Don’t be fooled: Kids know what’s going on and it doesn’t really need to be said. They may test you by throwing the other parent under the bus. Don’t take the bait. Encourage everyone to speak well of each other. You don’t have to lie or make things up, but you can say, “I’m sure mom didn’t intend for that…” or, “Your dad has your best interest at heart…”

Preserving the other parents reputation is so much better long term for the kids.


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